The Court of Their Royal Highnesses Queen Marie and King Nicholas.

*coughs* *stutters*


Um ... ah .... are you forgetting my love that we have yet to be married afore God?

*The ladies have undone the stays. My hair hangs lose and I'm only in my petticoats. I start taking off my jewelry and give you a sexy smile*.

*Clears his throat and tries to tell himself to be strong*

Marie, this is not appropriate ... think of the scandel


*even as he speaks his heart is pounding, he is so close to say the hell with honor*

*Marie looks at him with a look that makes 80 year old men hump trees with desire, and removes her petticoats, so now she's only in her undergarment, he can clearly see every cleft on her body. And the boots*.

*Tries to be honorable and look away but he is not successful, his eyes are drawn to her as much as his heart and body want her. He knows if he takes one step closer to her he may not be able to control his senses any longer. His honorable and noble heart insist he treat her as a Lady, but other parts of him are in dispute*

*As the inter struggle rages on with in him he says the only thing he can think of at the moment ....*

Um ... nice boots

*Lays down on the table, with legs crossed*. Do you want to lick my boots now?

Cut it out you sluts & manwhores! Or I'll spank you both! Seriously!

*a scarlet hue has risen in his cheeks, his breathing is ragged

I .... oh but you are perfectly wicked *he says breathlessly*



*then laughs rather nervously* it seems my honor and yours hath been saved by the bell

No, she offered to spank us. Sound like fun! *Rolls over so now, I'm laying on my stomach with my large and shapely buttocks in the air*.

*Smiles, clearly enjoying Nicholas' tomato red face*.

Whack and smack! Now behave or there will be more of that for both of you!

Thou art a most epic party-pooper. *Pouts sexily*.

*reading of the scandalous behaviour (which she wast initially sure Walsingham hath contrived to check if she really doth pay attention to the parchments he hands her daily) she doth love her haunting maman all the more for interrupting it... afore she retches*

Thou art a most mindless slut! Wipe that stupid look of your face! Or I'll smack it off. And you Sir Nicholas, this forum is not your personal harem!

Oh, Anne. Don't be such a spoil-sport. Maybe if Henry was still coming to your bed chambers, you wouldn't be so ... tightly wound.

I ... er ... I *stutters*


I was TRYING to ... I tried to persuad .... But Marie ...


Oh bother *he mutters*

Sir Nicholas for you I recommend some cold showers. Marie Stuart you are hopeless, but I do plan to cancel you Sir Fredericks of Hollywood subscription!

HEY! I'm paying good money for that subscription!

Fredericks of Hollywood? *looks hopeful*

*shakes head to remove thoughts and focus*

Right ... Cold showers .... Yes Queen Anne, you are most wise.

*reading the transcripts of this conversation back at court in England Bess murmours slightly at this point*

Ah, so that's what Marie spends all the scottish taxes upon!

*Bess looks around to check no-one ist watching then locks the account books for her own Kingdom safely away. No-one shalt know that she does the accounting herself entirely to hide her mail order payments to Agent Provocateur*

Well you can kiss it goodbye! You look ridiculous in all this pleather! Good lord woman you are a fright! From now on we will have some decorum here or else! And you really don't wnat to know what else!

Don't you dare Nicholas! I need you for later. ...

And I have the faint feeling that Elizabeth is watching me right now ...

Sir Nicholas lets just march you off to that cold shower right now and when we are done you can distract yourself by saying the alphabet backwards in French!

ANNE! Why must you always ruin everything? *Pouts*.

French ? *looks most frightened* but .... I doth not know any French

*cast Marie a "now you have gotten us into to trouble look" *

*Bess reconsiders her wedding gift and thinks the ghost of Anne Boleyn a far more entertaining choice... for her*