The Court of Their Royal Highnesses Queen Marie and King Nicholas.

I don't get it Chuck, Juana was gorgeous, Philip was drop dead gorgeous and look at you. Your majesty who whipped you with the ugly stick? So do you remember me? From Margaret of Asutria's Finishing School for Young Hapsburgs?

I could never forget you, Anne.

I never claimed to be a perfect specimen of physical beauty.

Anne I hath heard her say just that ... Elizabeth is an amazeing woman.


*bows* The pleasure is all mine Emperor. I am Sir Nicholas of Rhodes, Marquis of Pembroke and future King Consort in these lands. Welcome to the Court of Queen Marie of Scots.

I find your metaphor of the clocks most truthful ... I hear you have a bit of a fancy for clocks.

Well I suppose being rich and imperial and all has much to recommend it to the ladies. So does that overly well-endowed chin mean anything else on you is equally overly well-endowed?

*nearly spits wine out of his nose*

My God Anne but sutelty is not your forte *laughs*

Is this how you talk to all the men, your grace?
My empire is rather large. Is that what you meant?

*thinks to himself* good one Charles *then thinks to himself* give it up man, you can not best her


*sips his wine and watches the show unfold*

I was always famous for my rather direct nature and no Charles twas not your empire I was inquiring about. Show me your hands, remove your boots and let me see your feet. I must assess this situation!

*is starting to adore Anne more and more with every passing moment*

Ah I can tell where Elizabeth aquired much of her spirt *smiles*

My good woman, I will not be removing my boots. Unless you are offering to wash my feet as an act of penance for your behavior towards my aunt?

To Her Grace Marie, Queen of the Scots,
Please remember your dignity as a Catholic queen and refrain from throwing shoes in the future.
With Greatest Affection,
Carolus Imperator

No I just have a foot fetish and I want to see how big your feet are, are they gnarly, do you keep your toenails trimmed etc. Do not tell the others as I wish to keep this little pecadillo a secret.

I am a bit temperamental but I can be alot of fun too. I wish Marie could see my happy side mayhaps she would like me better. Probably not. Anyways thanks for ordering her not to through any more things at me, that was kind. Now hows about letting me see your feet?

My dear Anne, if you had asked me such things before I married my beloved Empress Isabel, I may have accepted your generous offer. As it is, though, I must decline.

I will assure you, though, that a perk of being Emperor is frequent pedicures.

To his Imperial Majesty King Carlos of Spain and Emperor of the Romans,

I shall refrain from shoe throwing in the future. However, can thee blame me?

I cannot blame you for your anger. I can blame you for your choice as to how to display it.

(however, if you are going to do it, please make it count)

*Loud groans* Ugghh! Marie we were all getting along so well. I was being polite to everyone and we were all going to get to know each other a little better by sharing my foot fetish with me. And here you are! As inconvenient as the Spanish Inquisition. As you may know Charles and I spent out formative years together at Margaret of Austria's Finishing School for Young Habsburgs. Such merry times examining each others feet and stuff.

Shoot Chuckster Marie couldn't hit the broad side of a barn!

I beg your pardon for interrupting you Lady Marquess. *Smiles a wide and lovely smile*. I did not know you had a foot fetish. I personally have a thing for bisexual men. Yours is much more ... dirty. But whatever makes you happy.

Chuckster? [i]Chuckster?

I really do not know what to say.

Charles V wrote:

(however, if you are going to do it, please make it count)

*whispers* I will. Perhaps you could lend me some of those Spanish shoes which art so painful in one's corneas?

Yes I love to have my feet massaged and tickled and my toes licked and you know. Also I feel you can tell alot about a man just by looking at his feet. Don't you think so Marie?

Silly Chuckster, I gave you that nickname back at M of A FSYH. And you called me Bully. Can't you remember any of this?

*Turns a light and very appealing shade of green* I'm afraid I never look at the feet, as at my court they are most modestly covered.