The Private Chambers of Elizabeth

*Elizabeth enters and seats herself at her desk with a heavy sigh. She shuffles the state papers about on her desk but has no will for them at present. Her heart is heavy with worries for Nicholas and the position Marie continues to put him in*

*a soft knock falls upon the chamber door*

Tis Nicholas, If I am not keeping you from matter of state, may I enter?

Of course my lord. Please do close the door behind you.

*Elizabeth flutters a great pile of papers down upon the desk with little care for them*

At present I fear my most pressing matter ist mine own desire to run thine beloved through the heart with mine paper knife.

*she tosses the heavily bejewelled paper knife - a gift from Robyn Dudley - across the desk with lightly veiled venom and lets it clatter to the floor where she dismisses its very existance*

Sit Nicholas, tell me things I have need to hear. I hath been absent from thee too long and left thee under the care of a heartless harpy of a so-called Queen. How canst I ease thine suffering and therefore ease mine own?

*Nicholas first kneels down to pick up the jeweled letter opener and lays it gingerly upon Elizabeth's desk, then he takes his seat*


*smileing* My dear Bess thou worries too much over me. Thou truly art the best friend I hath ever hoped to find. Please sit with me and let me ease thine mind.

The words Marie spoke of me were true of course. But she did not mean them in a harsh way. She doth appear as many things to diffrent people, and her description of mine vision of her is accurate as is mine unconditional love for her.

We had come a long way she and I and were intensely happy. We had finally come to know and understand each other truly. Both of us seeing and accepting each other for who, what, we are.

We were looking forward to the birth of our twins and planning our wedding. The good Emperor had agrees to give her away. *Whistful sigh*

Then out of nowhere Francis appears declaring our marriage null and void. Tis a mess indeed. He could do much harm to her family and also he can do great things for her. I only want her to be happy.

Tis me she loves Bess. She hath told me so and I believe her. Tis me she wants. And when she ignores me in court or speaks unkindly of me tis only for show.

But what are we do to? He is the King of France and what am I?

What are you Nicholas...?

*Elizabeth speaks wistfully*

On occasion I do wonder myself...

*screwing pages of parchment beneath her fingers the anger takes over again*

...when she returns pieces of you back to me, tarnished and broken.

*Elizabeth fights to have her Queenly control and willfull mind keep control of her emotions, but she cannot hide these things from Nicholas any longer, not when Marie torments the both of them so with her games*

You are stronger and wiser than both Marie and Francis put together, I know this! But she has broken you, bound you, made a fool and a plaything of you and I WILL NOT HAVE IT!

I gave you to her Nicholas, I gave you to her. Do you remember? When you gave me the choice to make? I did not wish to let you go but I could not offer you that which you wished for that would make it worth while for you to stay.

I saw a chance for you to be truly happy, to be whole again. And I thought you would inspire greatness in her - and you did. Together I hoped you would both be happy, but your time together has been scattered throughout with the pain she inflicts upon you. You do not see it in hindsight, you see only the happiness, but every time she has injured thee, I have felt it too, I have carried the guilt that she should have had because it was I that released you to be with her. And I wished nothing of this upon you. I only wished for you the happiness I could not claim for myself, and the goodness that Marie had never before witnessed. I thought her then a spoilt child, broken by the loss of a beloved husband and thrown into a land she knew nothing of and had no sense to rule.

I see now I have done nought but fed you to the very lions and given her the means with which to take more power than she will ever have the kindness to weild.

I do remember *thinks back to what seems like a lifetime, when Elizabeth granted him leave to take Marie from her prison and back to Scotland*


Oh Bess, But thou are wrong ... thou were right about her then, there is so much good and love in her. I have seen it, I have felt it.

I will not lie, she hath hurt me, she hath played games and toyed with me but we had worked past all of that, damn it we were so happy finally ... and now this child comes back from the grave to ruin us.

I am telling thou this because before thou left Marie and thineself had made great strides in strengthing the trust and friendship betwixt you, I shall not see that ruined by a minunderstanding or on my account.

*almost pleading* Thou saw good in Marie once, I am telling you that goodness is still there, and if ever there was a time she needed support and good council tis now.

*Elizabeth sighs heavily and blinks tears from her eyes that stubbornly refuse to go*

For you Nicholas I will, though hell be damned I still feel the greatest desire to have her run through.

*she sniffles a little, raises herself from the desk and turns away so that her tears may not show.*

As for the friendship betwixt Marie and I, tis naught but for thine sake and for the good of the realm. I would teach her how to be a better Queen for Scotland and how to take to heart the needs of the people of England should they ever have the misfortune to have her as their ruler. Every time I see the sparkle of that good in her that I hourly hope for, my heart doth overflow with joy that we are kinswomen. But within moments she always crushes my hopes again.

I can play games for the good of the realm but I cannot fool myself in her any longer for would be great folly indeed to underestimate her now she has the full power of France behind her. I cannot entertain my own wishes any longer, I must use but what we have already got and make the best of it.

...tell me one thing though Nicholas. Truthfully. When hast she ever put thine own needs afore her own and shown thee the compassion of one who truly loves? For I see it in thee every moment you are with her, but never even hear of it done on her part. I have searched hard for proof of the love and kindness that you insist she has but only see it in my mind when I try to convince myself of the good in her.

She let me go. *sighs in shame* While you were away I met someone, one of my own kind. I was loney and convinced I had already lost Marie to Francis...

Marie let me go to be with this woman, to be with my own kind. I saw it in her eyes that I had broken her heart but still she let me go. And when I realized it was a mistake she took me back. I betrayed her and abandoned her with child and she took me back with loving arms, forgave me.

If she did not truly love me while would she do that?

*Elizabeth doth catch her breath a little, startled at the revelation. Then she nods with purpose, her mind is made up.*

Then that ist the proof I do need Nicholas.

*she turns and faces him with determination*

I shall go to her and see what can be done. To help her and help you both as well as can be done without risking the peace betwixt our realms.

*sigh*

But I hath not the strength for it yet, I must compose myself further and go to her with the strength to hold the three of us high.

You may leave me now Nicholas. I would be alone.

*Elizabeth turns away, lost in herself as though the room ist already empty*

*though her back is tuned bows deeply none the less*

Good night my dear friend and thank you *says quietly leaveing the room not sure of she has heard him or not*


*As he makes his way to his own chambers his heart is somewhat lighter knowing that Marie shall not be abandoned by her cousin and that perhaps Elizabeth will once again see the good in her that he does*

*Elizabeth stands at the window for some time until her ladies do come to prepapre her for her bed. Once curled up beaneth the sheets she doth allow herself the rare indulgence of sobbing a little afore chiding herself for behaving like a spoilt child.*

*Moments later her train of thought leads her to a decision and she doth climb from her bed, stride purposefully across the room and enter her chamber of office once again. Pushing papers from her desk with determination to make a space she allows her sleep addled ladies to clamour about her lighting candles, clearing parchment from the floor and insisting she put on her robe afore she catch cold.*

*A letter ist written with haste and sent out to its intended with great speed.*

---

Querido,

forgive me for intruding upon thine sleeping hours and thrusting upon thee so sudden a decision, but tis my way and if thou wilt have me thou wilt learn to accept mine faults such as they are.

My mind and heart are set upon our marriage. Immediately.

Matters do press upon me which require urgent attention. I must put myself somewhat in harms way betwixt Marie of Scotland and Francis of France. Neither truly favour our match and I fear they will have me choose to discard thee as a bargaining tool.

Therfore tis essential that we wed immediately afore God and witnesses so that not even a Prince of the blood canst tear us apart.

If thou wilt have me, please send word back with great haste and I shall make immediate arrangements. I wilt drag the priest from his bed and have him marry us in our night gowns if it be the only way.

I know not if such secret arrangements wilt displease thine father and so wilt leave this decision to thee. If there is a chance he wilt assist us in our secrecy, implore him to join us for I would have him for our witness. If he will be angered by it but you are still with me, then hasten to me and we shall be wed and to hell with the courtiers, the crowned heads of europe, and mine ministers.

Thine if thou wilt have me,
Elizabeth.

Querida, estimada, Elizabeth,
Sounds like fun. Let's do it.
Two priests, though- one of my faith, one of thine. I admit I relish the idea of His Imperial Majesty finding out. I fear he may sputter.
-Juan Jeronimo

*Elizabeth prepares missives to be carried to the chosen witnesses upon word from Juan. They command the presance of both without question, in attire fit for the company of royalty. It is also stated that no-one else be notified of this command - including wives and servants - or else their heads wilt be severed from their bodies so fast that they will forget which year they were born in.*

*Her work done and the priest summoned for the purpose of praying for the souls of assembled Royalty, Elizabeth doth set upon choosing a gown and steeling herself for her most difficult task to date.*

*A courier from Her Majesty the Queen of Scotland arrives and knocks politely*.

*Elizabeth in being dressed, fearful of being seen, and sends a lady to attend to the courier*

*The courier smiles at the lady and after a brief exchange hands the Lady a letter for Sir Nicholas and one for Elizabeth. He patiently waits for a tip*.

*the overly flirty lady attending the courier throws him a golden coin and whispers that if he gives her name at the kitchens he will find himself ably provided with food and wine*

*Silently compares the woman to his mistress (OOC: Female master, not extramarital partner, lol. Thought I had to specify), smiles, winks and goes down to the kitchen, awaiting any returning letters*.

*as Elizabeth is handed the letter she doth sigh*

Canst I not be given a moment to myself even at this hour?!

*she seats herself down to have her hair combed and opens the letter intended for her, unable to avoid her duty for long. The knowledge that it doth come along with another intended for Nicholas doth press the matter. Though tis her first instinct to have the letter taken to him immediately, her own need for secrecy this night doth stall her actions. She hopes that the words intended for her wilt give her some indication whether or not to forward the missive for Nicholas afore the morning light.*

*Nicholas recieves the summons and reads it curiously. He smiles wondering if he guesses the intent. He does not send a reply only offers the courir a coin and sends him away*

Dear Bess but thou art a crafty one *he whispers to the empty chamber as he goes about readying his own clothes, not trusting even his steward to enter.

*When he is ready he will use the secret passages he knows so well to make his way secretly to the palace Chapel.*

*The letter reads*

My dearest sister,


I grow tired of my ... suitor problems. I wish to know your full views, in writing, in unambiguous language so that I may go forward with all due mind of what is in both the best interests of England, and of you - as if the two could ever differ. Please reply as soon as you are able to your sister who eagerly awaits your sage and kind counsel. And remember me always,


Your dearest sister,
Marie R.

*Elizabeth sighs and demands a quill and parchement, hoping that her husband-to-be wilt not mind her arriving at the chapel a little ink stained*


Marie,

I am still somewhat in the dark with what hath taken place during mine absence, though believe myself to be unalterable on my opinions of thine suit. They are as follows.

As a kinswoman who doth care for thine wellbeing we would wish thee to make a final and definite choice of a husband, and stop tangling thineself in impossible webs of chaos where menfolk are concerned. The sport may amuse thee but ultimately it hath caused thee heartache and troubles which threaten thine life and thine throne every time.

Choose wisely. He must be able to best support thine needs in every way as a woman and as a Queen. Consider thine heart, thine task as Queen, thine wealth and security. In simple terms Marie, which man wilt make thine life easier to live.

As a monarch our wishes are quite the same. Thine entanglements do endanger us all and the sooner all do know where they stand, the sooner we can work upon ensuring the safety and security of all our kingdoms. Thou art now a strong, intelligent and independent Queen and as such we shall place our trust that whomever ist thine choice, England wilt always be considered thine friend and neighbour. Be unswerving in this and we shall always support thee and think of thine best interests.

As for mine own heart.... I wish thee happiness and security Marie, and I pray daily that you will release Nicholas from his torture, whichever way, at the earliest possible hour.

Hopeful for thine happy future,
Eliz R.

Marie taken care of for the moment, Elizabeth doth now make her final preparations afore she canst head toward The Chapel Royal

*The same courier comes bearing another letter from the Queen of Scots*.